I just got out of the shower and observed a strange phenomenon upon drying off and getting dressed. I was sparkling. I was glittering. I was a one woman disco ball.
I was confused.
“Babe,” says I, “You didn’t happen to put something glittery in the laundry with the towels, did you?”
Jen- “No…”
Me- “Ok. Did I perhaps have a stroke I didn’t know about? Or did I get bit by a vampire?”
Jen- “No…”
Me- “But I’m sparkly. Like Edward Cullen in the sunlight sparkly. Like diamond powder dusted Tony nominee sparkly.”
Jen- “So you are.”
And more practically, says she, “What did you shower with?”
Me- “Nothing freaking sparkly! What the heck is wrong with me?!?”
…
Check shower gel.
Iridescent moisturizing blah blah blah.
Me- “Bastard ass shower gel manufacturers.”
But at least it wasn’t a stroke and Jen has also assured me that I am definitely not a ghost because ghosts don’t get head colds.
Moral of the story: It is more important to read your shower gel than to read Twilight.
grownupsforpretend 