Typical night of a future young lawyer

I just got out of the shower and observed a strange phenomenon upon drying off and getting dressed. I was sparkling. I was glittering. I was a one woman disco ball.

I was confused.

“Babe,” says I, “You didn’t happen to put something glittery in the laundry with the towels, did you?”

Jen- “No…”

Me- “Ok. Did I perhaps have a stroke I didn’t know about? Or did I get bit by a vampire?”

Jen- “No…”

Me- “But I’m sparkly. Like Edward Cullen in the sunlight sparkly. Like diamond powder dusted Tony nominee sparkly.”

Jen- “So you are.”

And more practically, says she, “What did you shower with?”

Me- “Nothing freaking sparkly! What the heck is wrong with me?!?”

Check shower gel.

Iridescent moisturizing blah blah blah.

Me- “Bastard ass shower gel manufacturers.”

But at least it wasn’t a stroke and Jen has also assured me that I am definitely not a ghost because ghosts don’t get head colds.

Moral of the story: It is more important to read your shower gel than to read Twilight.